Sa bai dee... Sa bai dee bor?

Greetings, are you well? (translation from Lao above). It's been a busy week - so Sam's blog is really a family affair - It's late Monday night and I'm at home putting finishing touches to the girls suitcases, as they prepare to return to Laos tomorrow with Francis and our friend Jae. The girls are really excited about heading 'home' and seeing their dear friends, dogs and familiar surroundings. They will be having some time in north Thailand with friends and also time at 'home' packing up their toys and helping Francis & Jae pack up the house. I've spent some time this week wracking my brain as to the contents of the house and writing out lists of what to ship back, what to sell and what to give away..... and I'm sure I've forgotten lots.

Sadly last Thursday a very dear and special family member died - Sir Howard Morrison. On Friday Francis and the girls went to Rotorua and were very privileged to be at his tangi (funeral). To be with the family as they remembered and grieved for this great man was an honour for Francis. They spent 3 days with the family but he needed to return last night in order to catch up with Samuel and me before packing and heading away tomorrow.

All of this coming and going passes by Samuel - he just lies in his bed happy and content as long as there is someone caring for him. The great people that have gone before him (of whom Sir Howard is one of them) as well as the wonderful friends we sadly leave behind in Laos mean nothing to him. Yet they are all relationships that have been apart of our journey to help shape the people we are now. I'm so glad the girls get to go back to say goodbye to Laos and their friends - it's so important. It's also important for Francis to tie up work things, although it is hard for him as he loves the people and his job very much. For me I'm trying to be positive, but really I'm sad as I would so love to be with my friends again - I'm too busy thinking through lists of what/who to have when/where... but I know that tomorrow night in the quiet of the hospital room, missing my family, I will allow myself to grieve for Laos, as this trip really finalises things for us. To have left so suddenly and now to make final plans to live in NZ is a challenge - we really experienced true community in Laos as we all lived and shared our joys and downers, our food and houses, our kids and life... it was so wonderful and I will never ever forget it.

Yet all these relationships are still there - just across continents.... and the change is all because of our darling little Samuel.

So on to Samuel - he's had an up and down week. He continues on antibiotics for his urine infection. The last couple of nights blood has been in his urine from his ureterostomy, and then today it seemed to slow/stop producing urine. This is/was a concern, but after adjusting his catheter it seems to have continued flowing again at the normal rate. There are a few ideas why there is blood - could just be localised trauma caused by inserting the catheter or it could be that the blood clot that was present months ago is dissolving.... or it could be due to an infection. There doesn't seem to be any conclusive way of checking, and as he doesn't have a temperature or be particularly distressed we are just going to watch him closely.

He is still being fed 2 mls an hour via a pump (that way it is at a constant pressure) directly into his jujunem (?). So far so good and they may increase that. He has gone off the bottle at the moment, but we still try it randomly through out the day. This is more so he has oral skills and experiences pleasure than actually any dietary benefit.

Last time Francis was away Samuel had his little, 'I don't want to breath anymore' episode which was just plain scary. Sams life is still so vulnerable and he can change so quickly and I am praying that we have a boring and non-eventful 11 days, if you get what I mean. When my mind starts going crazy I remind myself of the verse in Matthew 6 V 34, 'So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today'. It is lovely to have the wisdom of heaven practically making a difference to me in our little hospital room as it soaks into my little brain and helps me cope on a daily basis.

I'm much more hands on with Samuels care now - am changing his colostomy bag, doing his 4 hourly cares (emptying various 'ostomies') and have started learning the sterile technique so I can hook him up to his nutrition at home. It's quite intensive and I so want to get it right, as any infection is serious for Samuel, so the days in hospital are now very full and fly by.

I will try and update the blog daily whilst Francis is away, so he and the girls can be kept up-to-date. Francis will have a busy time in Laos sorting out many practical issues (packing up house, work issues, looking after girls), so he would appreciate your prayers for good health and ease/speed of tasks (that's no small thing in Laos!). We really want Samuel to have a settled time, getting stronger and fighting off this infection and protection for his kidneys which are always vulnerable when he has an infection.

We couldn't have gotten through this past week without Aunty Toria looking after the girls, sitting with Samuel, or just doing our dishes so we could get ready - thanks Tors, you've been amazing.... I look forward to devouring a very large block of chocolate with you in my hospital room one night when Francis is away!!!!

I've been trawling through our photos on the computer and wanted to insert some photos that hold special meaning to us. The photos with Sir Howard is very special to us, after a wonderful Morrison family reunion at Christmas time; our first bunch of bananas from the first tree we planted in Laos; and lastly villagers from southern Laos who inspire us with their tenacity and strong family units amidst daily hardship.

To our extended whanau as they prepare for the sadness of tomorrow, to our family and friends here in NZ and for our special friends in Asia that Francis & the girls will be hanging out with in the coming 11 days, our love and prayers go out to you.

Arohanui, Shirley